"Man, I'm not as good as I thought I might be" stage?
For me personally, I'm talking about my journey into photography. I hope this will flow pretty-fully, but I have thousands of thoughts running through my head that I can't type them fast enough. I may just make a list then expound on that.
ok so I'm going to make a list...
☛ I started into photography because I
LOVE capturing the beauty around me and trying to do it in a creative way. Whether it be nature or people.
☛ Since there are a TON of photographers in Utah, I immediately felt like everyone was trying to one up the other. (I realize that may just be my own reaction and thoughts and no one elses, BUT... but it's still there)
☛ There's so much to argue in what you should charge, what the going rate is, what prices say about your photography, blah, blah, blah.
☛ The money isn't my motive.
☛ But I WILL admit, sometimes I get caught up in thinking about the possibilities of what my dream team camera gear would be, and of course, that takes a little moola.
☛ I want to become better NOW. (Sometimes I have no patience) I want to practice everyday on people and ideas and locations. That's not realistic. I can't just walk up to people and say, hey would you mind me practicing on your family for a little bit of a donation?! (As much as I would like to do free sessions and just shoot a lot, it takes time, so to be compensated definitely helps)
☛ I want my editing to be clean, almost true to life, so it seems like there is little to no editing. I want my images to be timeless, almost so that you couldnt put a date on to when it was taken according to the "in style" of editing at that time.
I'm having a hard time achieving what I want and it's really pulling my hairs out.
☛ There's a silent pressure to find the coolest location, have the best poses... Me no likey.
☛ I struggle with liking my photos, this is where the "man I'm not as good as I thought I might be" comes in
And I'll tell you why. My favorite thing to do is to have my camera at an event and capture things as they are 'in the moment'. You get the real deal. That's why taking photographs of kids just following them around while they do something they love is DE BEST! Don't get me wrong, I like to take family photos, but here is where the struggle comes in in liking my sessions while going through and editing...they feel too staged sometimes. I really really try to not make my sessions that way. But of course you have to get some cute ones where the whole family is looking. I guess I just need to change the way I do my shoots. I almost just want to say, if you would like to hire me as a family photographer, I want you to choose something your whole family likes and I will come and document it for you. For example: if your family likes to camp.. let's go camp. I'll take photos of your family together sitting around the campfire, listening to someone play the guitar and sing songs together/story telling, cooking tinfoil dinners, laughing at laffy taffy jokes that aren't even funny they make you laugh.
Those are the kind of family photographs I want to hang in my house someday. Once again I do like the staged, everyone smile and look here photos. But one or two are all that I want. The rest I want is memories of what our family is all about. I want images of Seth making warren giggle when he nuzzles his head into rens belly. (I know I'm in charge of getting that shot and I'll get on that) but those are the kinds of things I want my photography to be about with those that hire me.
That's where the other thing of...how to make the clients feel so extremely comfortable that I can get them to just sit down and talk as a family and laugh and what not without feeling self consciousness that at any point I'll be sticking my lens in their personal space, or not.
I applaud you if you made it through all my jabber. Am I the only one out there that would like my life/family to be captured that way instead of, "ok everyone look right here.. smile.. let me see those teeth.." ? ( I'm quoting myself on that. blah)
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